Drifting Apart

Matthew 19:7-9 They said to him, “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?” He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.” (ESV)

These days divorce is so common that it’s completely unremarkable. It just seems like a valid lifestyle choice. In fact, you read articles in the paper even about the freedom that divorce brings. Really? Tell that to the children whose parents fell out of love!

In many countries, including my own, about 40 percent of marriages end in divorce. 40 percent!! How does that happen? I mean, have you ever wondered how does this couple, this man and this woman, go from the courting and romance stage through to the marriage commitment and honeymoon stage … and then on to the divorce stage? Have you ever wondered that?

What couples will tell you is that they just drifted apart. Rubbish! You don’t just drift apart. Here’s actually what happens.

When the honeymoon’s over the realities of life start to sink in. Little by little, these lovers start annoying one other. First, it’s just a niggling little thing here and there, but as the years go by those little quirks start driving them crazy.

So they stop forgiving. And instead of having soft hearts towards one other, as you do when you forgive, their hearts start to harden. It’s the scar tissue that forms, you see, when you don’t forgive.

Matthew 19:7-9 They said to him, “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?” He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.” (ESV)

Why do marriages fall apart? Because of hardness of hearts. And hearts don’t harden overnight – it takes years. The thing that stops hearts from hardening is forgiveness – over and over and over again.

That’s God’s Word. Fresh … for you … today.